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DownloadThere are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls
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Electricity is really just organized lightning
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front row seat
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What does it mean to pre-board Do you get on before you get on
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I am’ is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that ‘I do’ is the longest sentence
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Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things
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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town
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Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit
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Atheism is a non-prophet organization
